one more tomorrow

if i only had one more tomorrow... what would i do? i waste weeks thinking, analyzing every situation, gesture, comment, and expression. weeks... maybe longer. i stare off into space for hours. i sit at my computer screen punching the keys leaving my fingers sore. i put up walls that no human being could ever be expected to scale... i've wasted years on "careful". fuck that.
i waste so much time on maybes and what ifs. i am so fucking wasted. i don't want to be a wasted life... love.

if my allotment of tomorrows ran out... i'd stop thinking. i'd stop analyzing. i wouldn't type my emotions. i would excalim them. i wouldn't hide anything. i'd just do. express everything... i would aim for zero regret. i'd tell the people i love how much i need them. i'd hug my nephews tight, kiss my grandmother, and confess my guilt and let the tears run down my face to my mama. i'd hug my friends. kiss my lover.. i'd never stop talking accept to watch the sunset on my last day. i, more than anyone, should know tomorrow is awesome... and if it never comes, i'll wish i had used today.