You know... I had a really crappy evening. I wanted a hug very much. Is it a shame that I'm uncertain where I can get one? My eyes burn. My eyes burn from the salt that builds... and rests there while I push and choke it back. I wanted so badly to stop and get a hug from you. You are the first person I thought of... that's so dangerous. That's so mystifying. Terrifying. Comforting and unsettling all at once. This can't end well... hell, it can't even start. I wish I could share all these things with you... all my inner disgusting and enlightened thoughts. But, I can't. I can't even look you in the eye. I can't even tell you why. Silly. Stupid. Sad music makes me think of you. I don't want to be sad. I want to smile... because it makes you smile. On second thought, I'll stop it. I'll look away. I can't have what I want so I'll just stop wanting it. Yea, it's that easy. It's that simple. Why do I pour my guts out to you? Why do I feel the need to tell you more and more. Why? FUCK. FUCK FUCK. I don't want this. This is the only way to get this out. To type it out. I can't talk it out. I can't scream it out. I can't fuck it out. I can only type it out. But, it won't get out. It just fucking sits there. I don't want it. Take it back. Please.